283/365 - Touchless Everything

 

I have to use the bathroom

but my hands are purple

I have to use the bathroom

but my hands are purple

and everything in this house

is so very clean

I have to use the bathroom

but my hands are purple

and the doorknobs are shiny

and the towels are white

and everything between

here and the toilet

is so freakin' pristine

I have to use the bathroom

oh why did I have so much to drink?

I have to use the bathroom

but I don't want to trash the white porcelain sink

I have to use the bathroom

oh why wasn't I more careful with the paint?

I have to use the...

OH WAIT!

There is a garage sink

right over there

and it's already grease smudged

and paint stained

and no one will care!

Then I can go upstairs

and use the bathroom, finally

and I don't have to worry

about putting my hands everywhere!